The Voice of the Right Speaks Its Mind

OK, I was willing to let the whole election thing slide, especially since I think he beat Mr. Gore and Mr. Kerry fair and square.

When he climbed up on the pile of rubble at Ground Zero and said he'd make the "terrists" pay, I thought, "Well, OK, it's a good cause."

When he invaded Afghanistan and chewed through the Taliban I thought, "Well, maybe they really are bad guys."

Saddam's got nu-cu-lars? OK, pound him good.

When he said "mission accomplished", I thought, "Wow! He does look good in a flightsuit."

Out that horrid seceret agent woman? Well, her husband did say bad things about the President.
If he needs to spy on my every move and listen to my every word, then I guess it's OK. He's the President isn't he? I mean, he should know.

He's right about the rich too. They are a grossly misunderstood minority. I guess. I wouldn't know. I'm not rich or anything myself. If he says they need tax breaks, so be it. I know my turn will come eventually. I'm planning to spend my tax refund on a paint job for the trailer.

Sure, he wants to send the National Guard to the border, but I hear they aren't really going to do anything. What's the harm? Maybe they could even teach the Mexicans some English. That would be nice.

I listened to those Generals, but I think Mr. Rumsfeld is just...um, intense. He always seems so polite in his clips on the O'Reilly Factor. And, OH, isn't Bill such a gentleman?

If Mr. President says he needs to listen to my phone calls, I say, "Go ahead!" He's the President. He should know what he's doing. Besides, I hear it's all perfectly legal.

But, today I read something that really just frosts my shorts. I mean here the President is doing such hard work, such good work, and something comes along to ruin it.

No, not that Iranian thing. Goodness, those people are Godless heathen, they deserve whatever Ms. Rice thinks is right for them. I'm even donating money down at the church for the Bible Drop we have planned when we kick their scruffy hides.

No, I'm talking about putting advertising on official US Postal Service stamps. I mean they always have such pretty stamps - flowers, Mickey Mouse, famous dead people, flags.

Why can't they just leave well enough alone? I'm so cheesed that I may just have to think twice about voting for Mr. Bush again. This is an outrage! This is a travesty! This is a clear and present danger to the nation.

What? Oh. He can't run again?

Never mind.

Truth Told by Omnipotent Poobah, Wednesday, May 24, 2006