Randometry

When Artist's Models Get All Pinocchio - Sure he's wood, but he's a real live boy!

Vroom, Vroom - The perfect car for that couch potato who has everything.

Cure for High Blood Pressure - Sure, it's a drastic treatment - but hey, it works for him.

Boom, Boom, Chicka, Chicka - I'd like to see one of them on the striper pole at the club. Hmm, umm, seeeeeexeeeeee!

Eat Only Eats What He Kills - Somewhere, Ted Nugent is looking at this and smacking his lips.

Dance Craze Sweeps Navy - We hear the sailor dude from the Village People really digs these tunes.

Play Ball! - Sing along brothers and sisters! It's your country too!

Who Let the Dogs Out? - Who let the dogs drive...who, who, who-who?

Testosterone Fever - In which Nate learns to make himself tres sexy. If that advice doesn't work, maybe this will help.

The Blue Screen of Death - Gerry Ford. James Brown. Bill Gates?

Upchucking a Fortune - Sure it's vomit, but it's WHALE vomit!

Tap, Tap, Tap, Tap - It's better than a kazoo band I suppose.

Mysteries of the Universe Revealed - Some questions just may be best left unanswered.

Penguins Gone Wild - Sure, they dress well, but they're true party animals.

Proposals Gone Flat - He just wants to shout his love out to the entire world. Buuuut...

Stuck to a Pole - For Ralphie, Christmas is eternal.

The Dick Vinci Code - I smell blockbuster book/movie/TV deal coming on.

But Mom! - Creepy kid time travels for kicks.

Take This Job and Shove It! - Tools for those contemplating a career change.

Notable Quotes - "If you asked them to sodomize their own mother in a movie, they would do so, and they would do it with a smile on their face."

The Loaves and Fishes - Give a man a fish and he will eat it, teach a man to fish and he'll be on a perpetual crappie expedition down to the big pond in Crawford.

Well, That IS a Novel Approach - You'll never take me coppers. Step back or I'll sodomize the dog. Do you hear me! Huh? Do you?

Where Would Jesus Hide? - You know, we wouldn't have this problem if he had the common decency to wear a striped shirt.

Truth Told by Omnipotent Poobah, Thursday, December 28, 2006