The Omnipotent Poobah Speaks!: Let Us Count the Ways of Random

Let Us Count the Ways of Random

Because I Hate Bill O and I Can - Special holiday? Upcoming birthday? Just want to piss off a Bill O'Reilly fan? Here's your chance.

Where is Your Evil Twin? - Of course, there are zero Omnipotent Poobahs in the database, but we're a Diety so we don't have a name twin. Take the test and find that long lost, rich relative you never knew about.

They Make My Orange Crate and Cardboard Box Look a Little Drab - As you sit in your cubicle, manacled to the chair and suffering from Vitamin C deficiencies from lack of sunlight, you can take a gander at these babies. You'll feel sooo much better if you do.

And Now on the Home Shopping Network! - You knew it had to happen, and it has.

Sex Toy or Baby Toy, You Be the Judge - I know I mix them up sometimes. They're both brightly colored, they're soft and squishy...hey, come on, don't say you don't!

How Come Our Librarian Didn't Look Like That? - Sure, it's another search engine, but it's notjust another search engine. Just to try her out, ask, "Are you a lesbian?" and repeat the question several times.

How Many Sailors Does It Take to Fire on a Cruise Ship - In a brilliant display of military might, Poland, one of the core members of the Coalition of the Inept, brought a German (oddly enough, yet another member) cruise ship to heel by firing a shot across der Deutsche ship's bow. I hate it when a coalition falls apart like that.

Can It Pay for the Insurance Too? - One can never stop the march of technology, especially when it marches straight to the dumbest places. Behold the next must-have automotive gadget!

Can't We All Get Along? - You've heard the legends. You've seen the movies. Now, see the real story of the Fightin' 101st Keyboarders.

Hey! It Could Happen - You never know what can happen. I understand the Boy Scouts now offer a merit badge for this.

Steve Irwin Was Only the First Victim - Beware the stingray.

Does Pat Robertson Know About This? - If only we could all be just like Norman.

Watch Out! You'll Poke Someone's Eye Out - This woman is clearly a staunch feminist...in much the same way Katherine "Tits To You" Harris is a feminist.